


Eyes I Dare Not Meet In Dreams

by JaguarMirror



Series: Glass Bead Universe [8]
Category: World of Warcraft
Genre: Gen, Happy Ending (I Promise), Misunderstanding, Pining - in fact a whole forest of conifers, Slow burn (still G-rated), Some Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-24
Updated: 2020-09-24
Packaged: 2021-03-07 20:07:32
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,859
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26633359
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JaguarMirror/pseuds/JaguarMirror
Summary: It's a week before the Hallows Ball (even if it's not mentioned in the text) and a misunderstanding threatens to kill the relationship between Anduin Wrynn and Mathias Shaw.  Anduin takes a gamble - but will it mend the rift?
Relationships: Flynn Fairwind/Mathias Shaw
Series: Glass Bead Universe [8]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1916869
Comments: 15
Kudos: 25





	Eyes I Dare Not Meet In Dreams

**Author's Note:**

> “Eyes I dare not meet in dreams  
> In death's dream kingdom  
> These do not appear:  
> There, the eyes are  
> Sunlight on a broken column  
> There, is a tree swinging  
> And voices are  
> In the wind's singing  
> More distant and more solemn  
> Than a fading star.”  
> \-- T.S. Eliot

Spymaster Mathias Shaw's voice was rough with surprise. "You want ... what?"

Anduin Wrynn, High King of the Alliance, looked up briefly from his work desk. "I want you to find Marcus the Paladin as quickly as possible. I need to see him soon." He signed a document, sanded it, set it aside, and began looking at the next one -- another requisition for the refugee settlement area. He mentally added up the amounts and then pulled the treasury report out of the stack of papers. After a moment, he realized that Mathias hadn't said anything.

He looked up to find the Spymaster staring at him in apparent horror. "Mathias? Is something wrong?"

"You want me to find Marcus? The... paladin who's the subject of some...fiction?" 

"Yes. The one from your recent report." He checked the accounts again. The treasury wasn't in good shape, but he really couldn't raise taxes. He’d have to go over this with the royal exchequer, though the woman’s ledgers and accounts always left his head spinning. He sighed and looked at the shipyard’s financial statements. 

"Is... that wise?"

Anduin nodded absently and made the note to transfer money from the shipyards to the refugee accounts. "Possibly not, but I think he's the best fit for this situation."

"Ahh..." the catch in Mathais' voice caught his attention. He looked up. The Spymaster's face was an odd shade of brick red. "Uh. You don’t need to… uh...Flynn and I... would gladly..." he swallowed hard. "I mean... I haven't asked him... but... uh..."

Anduin dipped his pen in the inkwell and made another note. "I really can't afford to have you gone that long." 

There was a lengthy silence. "Uhm... what are we talking about?"

Anduin looked up and found Mathias staring at him with a very peculiar expression. "About sending Marcus to Draenor. To that commander who keeps complaining about the pleasure-bot thing that he's been saddled with. I figure that Marcus and that bot will get together and it will either solve everything or make it twice as bad, but it'll be months before we actually find out which and in the meantime he’ll quit writing me letters. Because I’m very tired of hearing from him."

A number of expressions crossed the Spymaster’s face. He took a breath, nodded, and said, “Ah. Yes. Well, I believe Marcus might be in Bogpaddle. I’ll send an agent for him. Should have an answer by midmorning tomorrow. I’ll dispatch an agent now.” He turned on his heel abruptly and left.

Thirty minutes later Anduin suddenly realized why his Spymaster was reacting so strangely. 

His first reaction was horror and embarrassment that he’d misread everything so badly combined with a gut-level fear that there was absolutely no good way to resolve it. The likely scenario -- that they both pretend it never happened -- would result in an awkwardness between them and would leave Mathias wondering just when Anduin was going to bring it up. Calling him into the office suite and saying “we’re going to discuss this” framed the situation even more poorly -- an older man being called in by someone technically young enough to be his son to discuss a sexual relationship -- or worse, a ruler calling a subordinate in to talk about a sexual relationship. That felt manipulative and abusive.

Dealing with it by talking with Flynn was likely to make matters worse. If he didn’t find a way to fix it, there could be no more comfortable weekends at Mathias’ little cabin, and that unexpected realization cut deeply. The longer he sat and thought about things, the more rattled he became.

His strongest strategy for everything, from personal to global, was simply getting up and doing something -- anything -- to change the shape of the situation. After an hour’s fretting, he called two of his Lion’s Guards and took his gryphon to SI:7 headquarters. Leaving the bird and his guards at the stables, he made his way inside headquarters and handed a simple note to be taken upstairs. “I’m sorry that I made such a botch of things. Do you have time to talk?” and signed it with a simple “A”

His stomach was in knots. He was hot and sweating and nervous and kept trying to tell himself that he wasn’t terrified about making things worse with another bad choice of words, but he couldn’t quite talk himself into believing the lie. A group of trainees, identifiable by the gray button on their collars, gave him curious glances as they followed a trainer downstairs but other than that the area was quiet. He steeled himself for a long wait. After what seemed like centuries, someone finally came down the stairs and led him to Shaw’s office and offered a chair. 

The door closed behind him and Anduin was left staring face-to-face with his Spymaster, who eyed him warily. Anduin glanced down at the floor and swallowed hard, his mouth dry.

“I’m sorry," he said quietly. "I was really distracted. I misjudged everything. I…” He tried to look up but couldn’t meet Mathias’ eyes. “I… feel like an idiot.” He also felt like bolting out of the office, but it was too late for that. “And I’m honored and I want…” he added quickly, and then froze as the rest of his planned speech suddenly eluded him. He slumped, hands on his face, “...and I completely forgot what I want to say and I don’t know what to do now.”

“It’s been a rough month for all of us, Wrynn,” Mathias said gently. Anduin heard the scrape of a chair being moved and then a hand, warm and strong, stroked down the back of his head to his shoulders and rested there briefly; an odd sensation. Being royalty meant that almost no one touched you after you left the nursery at the age of four. He wanted to lean into that touch, as he did with Valeera’s touch but wasn’t sure if that would break the fragile truce that seemed to be building.

But the hand moved away. Mathias gave a slight chuckle, “In retrospect it is kind of funny. You didn’t see the notes that Marcus had. You’d have to be very desperate to try the things he was suggesting.” 

Anduin looked up and managed a smile. “And you were desperate to keep me from being hurt.”

“Pretty much.” 

“I can see that.” Anduin lifted his head and took a breath. Now came the tricky part of the conversation. “Your offer wasn’t something I expected. I’ve... read the histories and eventually realized that same-sex relationships were the ‘go-to’ solution for nobles and royalty when there was a need to avoid entanglements and pregnancies -- well, ever since the days of the Alterac empire. But the kings they mention were all my father’s age or older.”

Mathias crossed his arms and looked toward his modest bookcase. “Your father made the same choice, because a baby -- even an illegitimate one -- would have been a focal point for a revolt.“

He nodded, staring at his hands. “I actually knew that my father had a male lover. I saw them once. Late one night after Pandaria, I couldn’t sleep because of the pain, so I went walking in our suite to just… walk. Father was in the study with an officer. They were kissing and half dressed and… uh…” he made an awkward gesture. “I was shocked. It took a second to realize what was going on. I got out of there and back to my room as fast as I could. I couldn’t tell how feral he was at that moment, but if he exploded in rage, there was no telling what would happen.” It felt strange to be discussing such a private issue; something that he’d never told anyone before. 

Mathias nodded. “That was Captain Jordan Mattingly.”

“I never knew his name. I think I only saw him once or twice.” 

“He wasn’t assigned here in Stormwind. Held a post in Redridge, where his family was from. Died on Broken Shore during the first wave, a few hours before your father. Varian didn’t know about his death. Wyrmbane and I made sure his family was taken care of and that he got a good burial and his pension plus honors were transferred to Redridge.”

“Thank you.” The knots in his stomach began slowly uncoiling.

Mathias walked to his desk and pulled out a flask and offered it to Anduin. The drink was heady and strong and smelled of apples and something else. “Your father was very careful with his choices and only four of us knew what was going on. When he made the decision to find someone, Wyrmbane was the one who made recommendations and actually found excuses to send these candidates to your father.” 

Anduin paused, the flask at his mouth. “Wyrmbane? Halford Wyrmbane?”

Mathias gave a half-smile and accepted the flask back from Anduin. He tipped his head back and took a slow swallow. “You know, that’s what makes the whole thing so marvelous. Wyrmbane loves playing matchmaker.”

“I’m having a hard time picturing that.”

He chuckled. “Everyone says that. It’s what makes the situation so humorous. It wasn’t until I was in that prison that I realized he kept assigning Flynn and me to duties that brought us in contact with each other because he thought we were a perfect match. He did the same with your father -- dispatched young officers to meet him who would be a good fit. And before you ask, they didn’t know about your father’s intent. Your father looked for friendship first and then for… well… sex. Mattingly was at his side when he traveled to the Draenor garrisons.”

Anduin shook his head. “The keep is full of secrets. Sometimes I think I should leave old ghosts alone.”

“You can’t look away from the difficult things.”

“I know. Saurfang said the same thing to me.” He rose with a sigh. “I’ve taken up too much of your time. You need to get home and I think I need food and a bath and a book. I’m glad we talked.”

There was one last gesture to make, and he gathered up his courage as Mathias rose. “I really was honored by your offer,” Anduin said and stepped in close and dared to let his hand rest against Mathias’ cheek. “In the future if it comes to that, and if Flynn does agree,” and he paused, lips parted, mouth so close that he could feel the man’s breath. He could hear his own heart thundering. Mathias’ eyes were brilliant green, the pupils wide.

Anduin leaned in then and kissed him. Briefly, gently, feeling the strange bristly brush of mustache, feeling a warm mouth move under his, returning a promise.

“...I will accept. But for right now...” He stepped back, unsure of how the other would take it. 

Those green eyes were still dark, the lids half-hooded. Mathias gave a half-smile and the briefest inclination of his chin in a nod, “For right now there are other considerations," he said. "Good night, Wrynn.”

“Good night, Shaw.”

And the door closed silently between them.


End file.
